November 30, 2006
The Terrorist Whisperers
Forget x-ray machines and body wands and bomb-sniffing bowwows. The TSA is working on a machine that can uncover terrorists by combining the capabilities of the Horse Whisperer, the Ghost Whisperer and Angela’s Eyes. The folks at TSA (Touch and Stroke Agents) want to turn Israeli terror detection techniques into software algorisms so they can catch terrorists. This is because (multiple choice):
a. Americans are obsessed with technology
b. The TSA bureauboobs are obsessed with squandering more of our taxbucks
c. Wand-waving GED-dropout TSA hirelings are untrainable
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